Emptying out drawers, sorting books, organizing shelves, packing.  We are getting ready for a move to Italy — putting our things in storage and taking with us only what we need — clothes, a few books, some beloved toys for the children.

We hope to spend a year in Italy, outside of Florence, and we are looking forward to the upcoming adventure!  But first we must deal with all the stuff we have accumulated, and decide what we need to take, what we need to store, and what we can give away.

It has actually been a pleasurable process for me, especially the giving away part.  It feels great to lighten my load a little, and let go of the many things I have that I no longer need.  For everything I give away, I somehow feel freer, a little lighter.  Right now, less feels better than more.

Of course, there are varying degrees of less is more.  I wrote an article for the current issue of Lilipoh about Colin Beavan, AKA, No Impact Man.  Over the period of a year, Colin and his family gave up many things in order to live a life that had zero impact on the environment.  Check out the article here, and leave a comment here on my blog — are there things you would, or would not be willing to live without?  Those who leave a comment will have a chance to receive a free, one year subscription to Lilipoh (one winner will be chosen at random).

About Italy — for a several years we have been thinking about taking our children somewhere where they might experience a difference culture, learn a different language.   And the timing suddenly felt right for us now — so we have sold our home, we are working on our visas in order to make a long term stay possible, and, of course, we are packing our bags.

Looking into a future where many things will change and little is certain is both exciting and daunting!  But mostly exciting.  Now, back to packing!

But, shopping can be fun, even window shopping, as one looks at an array of beautiful things and imagines what kind of life one might have if a Red Poncho was part of the picture, or what might happen in life if a Pink Chinese Lantern illuminated the living room.

Shopping can be about possibility.  But in an effort not to indulge my fantasies too much, I have added an additional inner conversation to my interior dialogue.  I offer myself a few words, in the form of a question, in order to stop myself from really buying that Red Poncho or that Pink Chinese lantern.

Actually, two questions:  for awhile I would say to myself “Well, I can’t take it with me when I die,” but that basically stopped me from buying anything, even some necessities, so I had to modify that particular line of questioning.

Perhaps because I moved around a lot as a young child, I have a little wanderlust in me and I would love to move somewhere where they don’t speak English, say Mexico (or Austria, anyone?) for example, for a year (or so) while the children are still young.

If that ever becomes possible, I won’t be able to drag all of my stuff with me.   So now, before I take the Pink Chinese Lantern in hand, I ask myself “Can I take this to San Miguel/Vienna when I move there?”  More often than not, the answer is no, and I envision the poor Pink Chinese Lantern, meant to shine and glow, but destined, because of my poor planning, to sit in a storage unit and grow old and dusty.  So I don’t buy it (but isn’t it lovely).

The Red Poncho, on the other hand:  let’s just say, my life as I know it has changed completely.

For other adventures in shopping (or not shopping), check out Judith Levine’s book Not Buying It about her adventures not shopping for a year.

It’s almost Thanksgiving, a time that many parents spend in the kitchen.  For the occasion, some simple steps towards making the kitchen a child happy space

The kitchen is where food is transformed through cooking, where the rhythms and routines of the day and week are marked by the meals we make, where children are nourished by the food they eat and nurtured by the tasks they accomplish.

Children need healthy nourishment:

• Choose whole, unprocessed food when possible – fruits, vegetables, whole grains.
• Support local food and eat organically, eat seasonally and colorfully.
• Offer a variety of food at meal times, and don’t be discouraged by picky eaters, gently offer all sorts of possibilities without entering into a power struggle over food choices.
• We sometimes “eat through our eyes” –prepare meals which are aesthetically pleasing and fun!
• Encourage independence by having a shelf or drawer or basket filled with healthy snacks and fruits, so that the children can help themselves and learn about taking care of themselves.

That said, sometimes feeding children can be a real challenge!  The thing that has helped me most is to be patient and consistent about offering a variety of food, not to get discouraged (easier said than done when no one will touch the ratatouille that took five hours to make–note to self: keep it simple), and not to get into a power struggle over food.

Include Children in Mealtime Tasks – preparation through clean up:

• Children love to cook and bake, and it is important for them to work and to feel they can contribute to the well-being of the family, and contributing helps children gain a sense of their own abilities, and a sense of self-reliance.
• Include children in the preparation, cooking, and in the cleanup of the meals.
• Have child-sized and child-friendly kitchen ware on hand:  appropriate knives, cutting boards, graters.
• Keep pots and pans and other kitchen ware low and accessible, so that children can reach them for playing and for helping and for putting things away.
• Have a low stool by the kitchen sink for washing dishes.
• Have sponges and dish rags, in the child’s favorite color, readily available to make cleanup fun and purposeful.

It really helps me to have my children involved in meal times.  And they like it too — nobody enjoys grating cheese more than my three-year old!  Sometimes it does make things a little harder — water gets spilled, cheese gets everywhere, or I have to clean up again after they have cleaned up, but most of the time, it is worth it to have them engaged, involved, helping.

Children need rhythm and routine:

• Rhythm and routines give children a sense of security and stability – keep mealtimes regular and predictable.
• Develop a meal time routine, and assign certain tasks to each child:  set the table, say grace, serve the meal, clear the table.
• If inspiration is an issue, or if you are in a rut, create a rotating weekly or monthly menu for which meals to make.
• Join with your friends and “share meals” – For ex., cook extra lasagna for a friend’s family one night, and receive a home cooked meal from them another night.

Keeping a regular schedule and having predictable routines helps children develop good habits, eases their transitions between activities, and gives them a feeling of security and confidence.  That’s not to say that spontaneous moments have no place, last-minute picnics in the park can be a lot of fun!

Happy Thanksgiving!